Humility over Pride

Is there a time when you think you have allowed your pride to get over you? I think today is one of those times.

I am not going to deny that this week is difficult in contrast to the easier week before. On Thursday alone, I was preparing for the submission of 3 assignments. I think this is my new record actually. I have never had 3 submissions in a day in my past few semesters of my university education. But this semester is really record-breaking. I grew tired from all my assignments and readings. I was not prepared to face anyone jubilee and if I could, I'll love to de-stress by just talking about my week. Well, this is not the case this thursday. I actually grew more upset when I talked to some friends.

In context, I have an assignment or a project work that I am working on with a few of my friends and we were supposed to be discussing about an assignment. I knew I was not the best group mate and have not been very active with my discussion with them. Hence, I tried my best to voice as many ideas as I can to the topic we were studying on. I was caught off guard when they decided to go against most of the ideas that I contributed and tried to convince me of their arguments instead. I believe our assignment allows room for both their opinions and mine. Hence, I sought to come to a common ground trying to amalgamate both their views and mine with regards to the topic.

Well, the result was not very good. They found that I did not understand their point of view and grew increasingly passionate and convinced of their points. They tried to bring it out to me in a very stern and direct manner. They defended their points to no end and I tried to defend my opinions as well. I spoke in the most calm and the most understanding way possible and that only resulted in greater assertions and opinions by them. Many know me as a pretty strong-headed individual but today, I decided to back down. I agreed with them but with an unwilling heart. I grew increasingly upset deep in my heart but spoke to no one about it.

Why was I so upset? I wondered. Moreover, isn't it supposed to be a small discussion? It was perhaps the fact that it seems to them that only their opinion matters and there was no or little acknowledgment of my comment. It may also be the fact that they made the discussion more "hostile". Maybe even I felt personally attacked as the tone and manner at which they spoke seemed to demean me.

God revealed to me that it was my pride at work. I was very convinced that I made a valid point and that my point should be a point of discussion as well. I wouldn't want to back down until they acknowledge my point even to the smallest degree. And my inability to "win" over the argument and get them to agree with me upset me the most. I did not like to know that I was at the losing end.

Well, on my part, did I listen to their points graciously? Did I try to understand their point of view with no intention of arguing with my points? Did I therefore listen selectively instead of listening to the entire point of view they were trying to bring across? To most of these questions, I knew my answers. Pride got in the way and it affected the way I listen and therefore communicate with others.

And I am sure it is not by mere coincidence that I chanced upon this article: 3 STEPS ON HOW TO DEAL WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE. My friend shared this article with me too. It talks about the 3 steps we can deal with difficult people.

1. Examine Your Heart
2. Love (like) How Jesus Loved Us
3. Try Developing Self-Control

Well, I thought about it. Does it matter that I lose to them this one time or even subsequent times in the future? Perhaps, I should think of how I can humble myself and win them over in love and in deeds.

 The second is this: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' 

There is no commandment greater than these."

-Mark 12:31